4 tips to help you let go of resentment

Tips and scriptures to help you remove bitterness from your heart and spirit.

Resentment can be a very real part of life. Yet the Bible warns: "Resentment kills a fool and envy kills the simple" (Job 5: 2). Paul warns that "the servant of the Lord must not be contentious, but must be kind to all, capable of teaching, not resentful" (2 Timothy 2:24). It is much easier said than done! Our first step towards being people full of grace and peace (1 Peter 1: 2) is to form our hearts to see the warning signs that resentment is building up within us.

Some "red flags" indicate that we may be looking for problems.

Do you have the desire to reciprocate, to take revenge?
But God does not give us permission to harm anyone, either in words or deeds. He commanded: "Do not seek revenge or grudge against anyone among your people, but love your neighbor as yourself" (Leviticus 19:18).

Do you have to prove you're right?
We mortals don't like it at all when we hear others think we are wrong or foolish; we often resent others because they hurt our pride. Warning! "Pride lowers a person," says Proverbs 29:23.

Do you find yourself "chewing" a sensation as if it were a cud?
When we are so stuck thinking about our feelings that we cannot disengage, we are no longer able to follow Paul's advice to "Be kind and compassionate to each other, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God has you forgiven "(Ephesians 4: 32).

Releasing resentment is something we need to do for our peace of mind and to improve our relationship with God. As people of faith, we cannot afford to blame blaming others for our unhappiness. Even when others are wrong, we are called to examine our hearts and respond to others with love.

So how do we get started? Try these four tips rooted in the word of God to help you let go of grudges and bitterness and find forgiveness.

1. When you are hurt, allow yourself to feel hurt.
Say out loud, away from the hearing of others, what exactly hurts. "I feel hurt that she looked down on me" or "I'm hurt that he didn't care enough to listen." So offer the feeling to Christ, who knows what it feels like to be pierced. "My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever" (Psalm 73:26).

2. Take a brisk walk.
Burn some of the emotions so that your head is clearer. The scriptures tell us that "Anyone who hates a brother or sister is in the dark and walks in the dark" (1 John 2:11). We can often get out of that darkness with a little vigorous exercise. If you pray while walking, all the better!

3. Focus on the type of person you want to be.
Will you let resentment come between you? Review the list of qualities of a Christian in 2 Peter 1: 5-7 and see if your feelings are compatible with them. Otherwise, ask the Lord to show you how to reconcile your difficult feelings with your desire to serve him.

4. Extend peace to the other.
You don't have to do it out loud, but you have to do it in your heart. If this seems impossible, pray to Psalm 29:11 with a turn: “Lord, give strength to this person who has done me harm; God bless this person with peace. " You cannot go wrong in praying for the good of others!