Reflect today on any relationship you have that requires healing and reconciliation

“If your brother sins against you, go tell him his fault between you and him alone. If he listens to you, you have won your brother. "Matthew 18:15

This passage above offers the first of three steps Jesus offers to reconcile with someone who has sinned against you. The passages offered by Jesus are as follows: 1) Speak privately to the person. 2) Bring two or three more to help with the situation. 3) Bring it to the Church. If after trying all three steps you are unable to reconcile, then Jesus says, "... treat him like a gentile or a tax collector."

The first and most important point to mention in this reconciliation process is that we should keep silent about the sin of another, between them and us, until we have sincerely tried to reconcile. This is hard to do! Many times, when someone sins against us, the first temptation we have is to go ahead and tell others about it. This can be done out of pain, anger, a desire for revenge, or the like. So the first lesson we should learn is that the sins another commits against us are not details that we have a right to tell others about, at least not in the beginning.

The next important steps offered by Jesus involve others and the Church. But not so that we can express our anger, gossip or criticism or to bring them public humiliation. Rather, the steps for involving others are made in a way that helps another to repent, so that the wronged person sees the gravity of the sin. This requires humility on our part. It requires a humble attempt to help them not only see their mistake but change as well.

The final step, if they don't change, is to treat them like a gentile or a tax collector. But this too must be understood correctly. How do we treat a gentile or a tax collector? We treat them with the desire for their continuous conversion. We treat them with continued respect, while acknowledging that we are not "on the same page".

Reflect today on any relationship you have that requires healing and reconciliation. Try to follow this humble process given by our Lord and keep hoping that God's grace will prevail.

Lord, give me a humble and merciful heart so that I can reconcile with those who have sinned against me. I forgive them, dear Lord, just as you have forgiven me. Give me the grace to seek reconciliation according to Your perfect will. Jesus I believe in you.