ʻEkolu mau ala e hānai ai i kahi keiki piha o kaʻiʻo

ʻAʻole ia he spite, akā no ka hōʻeha o ke ola e pono ai mākou e hānai i ka manaʻo ʻuhane o nā keiki.

I kēia mau lā ua kau aku kaʻu hoaaloha ma kahi hui Facebook no nā makuahine ua hopohopo ʻo ia no kāna keikikāne e hōʻike ana i ke aloha maoli i ke Akua, kahi pane i ʻeha ai ʻo ia. "Makemake wau e ʻoliʻoli wale wau ia mea a ʻaʻole ʻike i kēia kaumaha ʻē," i ʻōlelo ʻo ia.

Ua noʻonoʻo iki wau i kahi ʻōlelo hoʻomākeʻaka: "He inoa-nui loa kēia na ʻoe". ʻO kuʻu hoaaloha, no ka mea ua lōʻihi wau e ʻike iā ia, ua hakakā me pehea e kamaʻilio ai i kāna mau keiki e pili ana i nā mea o ka hilinaʻi. ʻAʻole wau e kapa iā ia he cynic, no ka mea, ʻo kona ʻike i ka maikaʻi o ka honua a hiki i ka mea e hoʻomaopopo i ka maikaʻi ʻole e hopohopo nei.

ʻAʻole wale kaʻu hoaaloha. Manaʻo nā mākua ʻehaʻeha e pili ana i nā hana e hiki mai ana i kā lāua keiki, ko lākou ulu ʻana i ka ʻike i nā mea kaumaha, hewa a me ka ʻino, ʻeha. ʻĀwīwī, komo mai kekahi poʻe, aneane kūlou i ko lākou mau poʻo i ka ʻaelike. I ka ulu ʻana o nā manaʻo ʻuhane a kā lāua mau keiki, ua hōʻemi ʻia nā manaʻo hopohopo a me nā kaumaha o ko lākou mau mākua no nā mea hōʻeha hiki ʻole ke mālama ʻia e ka honua.

"Ma kekahi ʻaoʻao, aloha wau i ka ulu ʻana o ka ʻuhane o kaʻu keiki no ka mea hāʻawi ia iā ia i kahi panana pono a ke lana nei koʻu manaʻo, palekana iā ia a aloha ʻia," wahi a Claire, kahi makuahine o ʻelua mau keiki. "Eia nō naʻe, ʻaʻole hiki iaʻu ke hopohopo e pili ana i ke kamaʻilio ʻana me ia ma ke ʻano ke nīnau mai ʻo ia iaʻu i nā nīnau paʻakikī e pili ana i koʻu ʻano pilikino e pili ana i ka hale pule, kahi e hakakā nei e haʻi iki."

ʻAʻole maikaʻi au. ʻO kaʻu keiki 5 mau makahiki wale nō. Akā ma o kaʻu pule a me kaʻu mau hana hoʻokalakupua, ua hiki iaʻu ke hana i ʻekolu manawa i ka hoʻoikaika ʻana i ka bittersweet e hānai i kahi keiki piha i ka manaʻoʻiʻo.

Ka makahiki o ka hala ʻole?
ʻAʻole wau e hoʻāʻo e pale aku i ka hala ʻole o kaʻu keiki. He mea kūpono ʻole paha kēia i kekahi mau mākua, akā i kaʻu ʻike e hana ana i nā mea āpau e pale aku ai iā ia mai nā mea loko ʻino o ka honua e hōʻino wale ana i kaʻu mau hopohopo, a ʻoi aku ka maikaʻi. Ma hope o nā mea āpau, hana kā mākou poʻe keiki i nā drills shooters ʻeleu i nā kula haʻahaʻa. Makemake lākou e ʻike i ke kumu. Akā makemake pū lākou i kā mākou hōʻoia e hana mākou i nā mea āpau e hiki ai iā mākou ke pale aku iā lākou.

Pēlā nō, ke pale aku nā mākua keʻokeʻo papa waena o kahi keiki keʻokeʻo kāne (AKA koʻu ʻohana) i nā kamaʻilio paʻakikī e pili ana i ka moekolohe a me ka hoʻokalakupua, ʻelua mau hana hoʻomāinoino a me nā hana pono ʻole i kūpilikia ʻia e ko mākou ao, hana mākou no ka mea ʻole. Ua ʻōlelo ʻia i loko o koʻu ʻohana i kēia manawa mai kahi papa he ʻehiku pule i hoʻomaka ai kaʻu kāne e kamaʻilio me nā keiki e pili ana i ka hoʻokalakiko. ʻO ka papa, i mālama ʻia e kahi hale pule episkopal kokoke, alakaʻi i nā mākua keʻokeʻo ma o ka ʻoiaʻiʻo o kā mākou ʻike ʻole ʻana i ka līlī i nā keiki ʻōpio ke manaʻo mākou he mea maʻamau ia no mākou - aia mau nā mākaʻi e kōkua i ko mākou kaiāulu, i laʻana - ʻaʻole maʻamau ia no nā kaiāulu o ke kala.

ʻOiai, he ala kūpono koʻu i ka loaʻa ʻana o nā kamaʻilio paʻakikī me kaʻu keiki. Manaʻo pū wau hiki iā mākou ke kaomi iki i nā palena i ka mea a mākou e noʻonoʻo ai he "kūpono makahiki" a hāʻawi i nā keiki, ʻoiai nā keiki ʻōpio, ʻoi aku ka nui o nā pono ma mua o ke kānalua.

Ua ʻōlelo ʻo Lyz ua hoʻāʻo ʻo ia e hoʻomaka me kāna mau keiki ʻelua, ma lalo o 10 mau makahiki. "He ʻōpio loa lākou, no laila ke kamaʻilio nei, akā aloha wau i kēia mau manawa o ka nīnau a me ke aʻo ʻana, ʻoiai lākou e nīnau iaʻu."

Una storia senza maikaʻi
ʻO kekahi o nā kumu a māua a me kaʻu kāne e hoʻoholo ai e bapetizo i kā mākou keiki, no ka mea ʻaʻole ka moʻolelo Karistiano wale nō ka moʻolelo a mākou i hānai ʻia ai, akā ʻo ia kekahi mea a mākou e manaʻoʻiʻo nei he laʻa a piha i ka ʻoiaʻiʻo. Hoʻomaopopo iā mākou, ʻae, hiki i ka honua ke weliweli a hana i nā mea weliweli, akā ʻaʻole kēlā mau mea weliweli i ka huaʻōlelo hope loa.

ʻO koʻu hoa aloha ʻo Lila, ʻaʻohe āna keiki, he Iudaio moʻomeheu akā hānai ʻia e nā mākua i manaʻo e maopopo iā ia kāna mea i manaʻoʻiʻo ai nona iho. Mahalo, ʻaʻole lākou makemake e koi i kahi hilinaʻi iā ia. Ua manaʻo lākou he mea nui ia nona e ʻike i kāna mau pane ma ke koho ʻana i kāna noiʻi ponoʻī. ʻO ka pilikia, ua haʻi ʻo Lila iaʻu, ʻaʻohe ona mea e hana pū ai. I ke alo o ka pōpilikia, ʻaʻohe ona ʻano haipule e hilinaʻi ai. ʻAʻohe āna mea e pahu ai i hope, kahi e kuhikuhi iā ia i ka ʻaoʻao ʻē aʻe i kona ʻimi ʻana i nā pane a me ka ʻoluʻolu.

"Makemake wau i kaʻu mau keiki e ʻike i kā lākou mau pane ponoʻī," wahi a Lyz. "A makemake wau e hele lākou ma laila iho. Akā paʻakikī i ka wā liʻiliʻi a ʻeleʻele a keʻokeʻo nā mea āpau na lākou, akā ʻeleʻele ka manaʻoʻiʻo. “ʻO ia ke kumu i lawe ai ʻo ia i kāna mau keiki i ka hale pule a hoʻohiki ʻoiaʻiʻo i kā lākou nīnau.

E hoʻokuʻu ʻoe
I kekahi manawa, makemake ʻia nā mākua a pau paha i ka hānai i nā keiki ma kahi moʻomeheu haipule, e hoʻokuʻu lākou. Hoʻomaka mākou e hoʻokuʻu iā mākou iho mai ka wā o lākou he pēpē, e ʻae ana i kā mākou mau keiki e loaʻa hou ka makemake ʻē aʻe i ko lākou ola. ʻO ke keikikāne 6 mau makahiki ke koho a wehe i kāna mau kīʻaha ma hope o ke kula. Koho nā makahiki he ʻumikumamākolu i nā kāmaʻa āna i makemake ai e kūʻai no ka lā mua o ke kula. Ke alakaʻi nei nā makahiki he ʻumikūmāhiku iā ia iho i ka pôpeku.

Ke komo nei i ka ʻano like i ka hoʻokumu kino ʻana o nā keiki ma ke ʻano like me kēia e hiki ai i nā mākua ke hoʻokuʻu a hilinaʻi i kā lākou poʻe keiki. Akā e like me ka manaʻo ʻole e ʻike kaʻu keiki e ʻike i ka wehe i kahi ʻeke o nā kīʻaha gula maʻa ʻole me aʻu e hōʻike ana iā ia pehea, ʻaʻole hiki iaʻu ke manaʻo e ʻike iā ia e pule.

"Ua hakakā nui wau me ka manaʻoʻiʻo a ua lili pinepine wau i nā hoaaloha a me ka ʻohana i manaʻoʻiʻo maʻalahi," wahi a Cynthia, nona ka manaʻoʻiʻo o kā lākou keiki e like me kahi moʻolelo puke hoʻomākeʻaka, piha me nā villain, "nā kānaka maikaʻi" a me nā mana nui. . "Ua hōʻole loa wau i kēia ʻike i ke Akua. No laila ʻaʻole wau makemake e hoʻonāwaliwali i [kona manaʻoʻiʻo], akā makemake wau e hoʻonāwaliwali i kona ʻike i kēia manawa no ia." Ua ʻōlelo ʻo ia makaʻu ʻo ia i ka nui ʻana o kāna keikikāne ʻo kēia hoʻokokoke ʻana i ka manaʻoʻiʻo e hoʻoluhi iā ia, a ʻoi aku paha ka maikaʻi, e ʻeha ʻo ia iā ia.

Ma ka makua, ʻo kā mākou hana ʻo ka pale ʻana i kā mākou mau keiki ʻaʻole wale nō mai ke kino olakino a me nā ʻuhane pili kino a me ka ʻuhane. ʻO ia ke kumu e pono ai e hoʻokuʻu aku i mea e koi nui ai. Hoʻomaopopo mākou i kā mākou mau ʻeha a makemake mākou e pale i kēlā mau hōʻeha like ʻole i hāʻule i luna o kā mākou mau keiki kāne a me nā kaikamāhine.

ʻO ka hoa aloha i kau ma Facebook, ke noi aku wau iā ia e haʻi hou mai e pili ana i kāna mau hopohopo, ua hōʻike ʻo ia ka mea e ʻeha ai kāna keiki. ʻO kāna mea ia e hoʻomanaʻo ai i ka ʻuhane ʻeha e hoʻonui ai i ka hopohopo. Eia naʻe, ua haʻiʻo ia iaʻu, "E hoʻomanaʻo wau ʻaʻole like kāu huakaʻi o ka hilinaʻi a me kaʻu. No laila makemake wau e hiki ke haʻalele i ka hopohopo i kēia manawa a hele wale i laila ke hele wau i laila