Umceli mngeni wokuthandaza kunye nokuphila okuqinisekileyo nabantwana: unokwenza njani?
Ukuba ufuna ukuthandaza kunye nabantwana bakho, kufuneka uqale udlale nabo
Ibhalwe nguMICHAEL NO-ALICIA HERNON
Xa abantu besibuza ukuba iyintoni injongo yobulungiseleli bethu bosapho, impendulo yethu ilula: ulawulo lwehlabathi!
Ukuqhula ecaleni, ukufikelela kwihlabathi liphela yile nto siyifunayo kwiNkosi yethu nakwiCawe yayo: ukuzisa yonke into kuKristu ngothando nangokuguqula. Ukuthatha inxaxheba kwethu kwesi senzo sokuhlangula kuqala ngokuvakalisa uYesu Krestu njengoKumkani kwaye siphila ngokufanelekileyo. Kusapho, obu bukhosi buhlala ngothando: uthando phakathi kwabatshatileyo kunye nawo onke amalungu osapho aphuma kukuthanda iNkosi. Xa luphila ngokwenyani, olu thando lunobungqina obunamandla beendaba ezilungileyo kwaye lunokukhokelela kwimiphefumlo emininzi kuKristu.
Liqala phi eli cebo "lolawulo lwehlabathi"? U-Yesu wenza kwalula ngokusinika ukuzinikela kwiNtliziyo yakhe eNgcwele.
Xa usapho lubeka umfanekiso wentliziyo kaYesu enothando kwindawo ebekekileyo emakhayeni abo, kwaye xa ilungu ngalinye losapho linikezela ngentliziyo yalo kuYesu, banikela ngentliziyo yabo ukubuya. Iziphumo zolu tshintshiselwano lothando kukuba u Yesu emva koko angawutshintsha umtshato wabo kunye nosapho. Inokutshintsha intliziyo. Kwaye konke oku ukwenzela abo bavakalisayo kwaye babanga ukuba bangabantu abalungileyo, abanenceba nabanothando inkosi yosapho. Njengoko uPopu Pius XI watshoyo, "Inene, (oku kuzinikela) kukhokelela ezingqondweni zethu ngokulula ukuze simazi uKrestu iNkosi ngokusondeleyo nangokuphumelelayo ukuguqula iintliziyo zethu ukuba zimthande kakhulu kwaye simxelise ngokugqibeleleyo" (Miserentissimus Redemptor 167).
Kuvela phi ukuzinikela kwiintliziyo ezingcwele zikaKristu? Phakathi kuka-1673 no-1675, uYesu wabonakala kuSanta Margherita Maria Alacoque kwaye watyhila iNtliziyo yakhe eNgcwele, evutha uthando ngabantu. Wamxelela ukuba ngolwesiHlanu wokuqala emva komthendeleko weCorpus Domini kwakufuneka ubekelwe bucala ukuhlonipha iNtliziyo yakhe eNgcwele kwaye enze imbuyekezo kubo bonke abo bangamthandiyo nabangamhloneliyo. Oku kuzinikela kwasasazeka njengomlilo wasendle phakathi kwamaKristu kwaye kungaphikiswa ukuba kuye kwaba yinto efanelekileyo ngakumbi njengoko iminyaka yayihamba.
Kulo nyaka, umnyhadala uwela nge-19 kaJuni. Eli lithuba elihle lokuba iintsapho zivavanye ubudlelwane bazo neNkosi kwaye ziqale ukwenza yonke into ngothando ngaye. U-Yesu wanika uSt. UMargaret Mary izithembiso ezininzi endaweni yokuthanda Intliziyo yakhe eNgcwele, kwaye ezi ziye zadityaniswa "kwiZithembiso ezili-12 zentliziyo eNgcwele".
"UMkhululi wethu ngokwakhe wathembisa uSanta Margherita Maria ukuba bonke abo bebezakuhlonipha intliziyo yakhe eNgcwele ngale ndlela bazakufumana ubabalo lwasezulwini ngobuninzi" (MR 21). Ezi zibabalo zizisa uxolo emakhayeni eentsapho, zithuthuzele ebunzimeni kwaye zithululela intabalala yeentsikelelo kuwo onke amashishini abo. Konke oku ngenxa nje yokubeka etroneni yakhe njengeKumkani wosapho!
Inantoni yokwenza le nto nomdlalo? Umfazi osisilumko ukhe wasixelela, "Ukuba ufuna ukuthandaza nabantwana bakho, kufuneka uqale udlale nabo." Emva kokuqwalasela amava ethu njengabazali, saqonda ukuba oku kuyinyani.
Zininzi iindlela apho ukudlala kuvula intliziyo nengqondo yomntwana kuThixo.Ngobudlelwane bethu bendalo nabantwana bethu apho senza imifanekiso yabo yokuqala kaThixo. "Uthando lwabo lwabazali lubizelwe ukuba lube ngabantwana. Abantwana luphawu olubonakalayo lwe Uthando lukaThixo uqobo ”, apho usapho lonke ezulwini nasemhlabeni lithatha khona igama lalo“ ”(Familiaris Consortio 14). Ukubeka umfanekiso kaThixo entliziyweni yomntwana luxanduva olukhulu kubazali, kodwa, njengoko uJohn Paul wayekuthanda ukubhengeza, akufuneki sikoyike! UThixo uya kusinika lonke ubabalo esilifunayo ukuba siyalucela.
Ngaphaya koko, xa sidlala, sithatha inxaxheba kwimidlalo yokuzihlaziya: siyaziphindezela. Umdlalo usinceda sonke ukuba sikhumbule ukuba singobani kwaye senzelwe ntoni. Asenzelwanga ukuba sibe sodwa, kodwa ukunxibelelana nabanye. Senzelwe umthendeleko kwaye kule nto singalufumana ukonwaba kunye nenjongo, kunye nabantwana bethu.
Ngapha koko, ayenzelwanga ukusebenza nzima: senziwe uvuyo. Injongo kaThixo yayikukusenza siphumle kwaye sonwabele umhlaba awasenzela lona. Ngokombono womntwana, ukudlala nabazali kuyonwaba ngokwenene.
Emdlalweni, siqinisa unxibelelwano nabantwana bethu, nto leyo eyenza nzulu ukuqonda kwabo ukuba bangabethu, nathi noThixo, ibafundisa ukuba banendawo kunye nesazisi. Ngaba lo asingomnqweno weentliziyo zethu zonke? Umntwana wakho unokukholelwa ngokulula ukuba uThixo uyabathanda kuba ubathanda. Yile nto inxulunyaniswa ngumdlalo.
Okokugqibela, ngokwembono yabazali, umdlalo usikhumbuza ukuba kunjani ukuba ngabantwana kwaye ukufana nabantwana yinto ebalulekileyo emthandazweni. UYesu wayicacisa le nto xa wathi, "Ngaphandle kokuba nijike nifane nabantwana abancinci, anisayi kuze ningene ebukumkanini bamazulu" (Mateyu 18: 3). Ukufikelela kwinqanaba lomntwana kwaye ube sesichengeni kwaye ulula, kwaye mhlawumbi nokuba sisidenge kancinane, kusikhumbuza ukuba kungokuthobeka kuphela apho sinokusondela eNkosini.
Ngoku abanye abazali, ngakumbi abo banolutsha, bayazi ukuba bacebisa ukuba "ixesha losapho" banokubuliswa ngamehlo ajikelezayo kunye noqhankqalazo, kodwa ungakuvumeli oko kukushiye. Uphononongo lwango-2019 luveze ukuba amashumi asixhenxe anesithathu eepesenti abantwana abaneminyaka emihlanu ukuya kwishumi elinesixhenxe bathi banqwenela ukuba nexesha elingakumbi lokunxibelelana nabazali babo.
Ke yintoni umceli mngeni wokuDlala nokuThandaza? Ukusukela nge-12 kaJuni ukuya nge-21 kaJuni, kwi-Messy Family Project sicela umngeni kubazali ukuba benze izinto ezintathu: ukubonana neqabane labo, ukuchitha usuku olonwabisayo nosapho kunye nokufaka i-Holy Sacred of Jesus kwikhaya lakho, ukubhengeza esidlangalaleni ukuba uYesu ngu Kumkani wosapho lwakho. Asaneli nje ukuba sibe noluhlu lweembono zeentsuku zosapho ezingabizi kwaye zintle, kodwa sikwanomnyhadala wosapho oza kuwusebenzisa kumsitho wokubekwa etroneni. Ndwendwela iwebhusayithi yethu ukuze ujoyine umngeni!
Olunye ukhuthazo lokugqibela yile: ungatyhafi xa izinto zingahambi ngendlela yakho. Ubomi buba nokudideka! Izicwangciso ezinamaqabane atshatileyo zijika zijongiswe xa kuvela ukungavisisani okanye xa umntwana egula. Umzabalazo uvela phakathi kwabantwana ekufuneka bezonwabisa. Abantwana banomsindo kwaye amadolo abo alusu. Ayinamsebenzi! Amava ethu kukuba nokuba izicwangciso zihamba gwenxa, iinkumbulo zisenziwa. Kwaye akunandaba nokuba umsitho wakho wokubekwa etroneni ugqibelele kangakanani na, uYesu usengukumkani kwaye uyayazi intliziyo yakho. Izicwangciso zethu zinokusilela, kodwa izithembiso zikaYesu azisokuze zisilele.
Siyathemba kwaye siyathandaza ukuba uzokuzimanya nathi kwimingeni yokuThanda nokudlala kwaye ukhuthaze abahlobo bakho kunye nosapho ukuba bathathe inxaxheba nabo. Khumbula, injongo kukulawula umhlaba: kweentliziyo ezingcwele zikaYesu!