Vumela uSt. Francis abe sisikhokelo soxolo

Masibe sisixhobo soxolo ngelixa singabazali.

Intombi yam eneminyaka eyi-15 isandul’ ukundibuza ukuba belunjani usuku lwam emsebenzini. Ngosuku lokuqala wabuza, ndaphendula ndathintitha, “Um. Entle. Ndaba neentlanganiso ezithile. ” Njengoko wayeqhubeka ebuza veki nganye, ndaqalisa ukuphendula ngokucokisekileyo, ndimxelela ngomsebenzi obangel’ umdla, ingxaki, okanye umntu asebenza naye ozonwabisayo. Ndithe ndisathetha ndazibona sendimjongile ukuba akanamdla na kwelibali lam. Kwakunjalo, kwaye ndaziva ndingakholelwa.

Ngaphezu kokukhula ubude okanye kwanephepha-mvume lokuqhuba, kukukwazi komntwana ukujonga umzali njengomntu ngeengcinga, amaphupha, nokuzabalaza kwakhe nto leyo ebonisa ukukhula nokuqola. Oku kukwazi ukuqaphela umzali njengomntu ongaphaya kwendima kamama okanye utata akunakunyanzeliswa. Iza ngokuthe ngcembe, yaye abanye abantu ababaqondi ngokupheleleyo abazali babo de babe badala.

Inxalenye yesizathu sokuba umzali adinwe kangaka kungenxa yolu budlelwane buqhekekayo. Sinikela ngayo yonke into esiyiyo kubantwana bethu, kwaye ngeentsuku zethu ezilungileyo bafumana ngenceba isipho sothando lwethu. Ngezona ntsuku zethu zinzima balwa ngokuchasene nothando kunye nenkxaso esiyinikelayo ngelixa besala isikhokelo sethu. Nangona kunjalo, ukuba ngumzali okunempilo kumalunga nokungena ngokupheleleyo kolu budlelwane buqhekekayo. Ukuze abantwana bazive bekhuselekile, bethandwa, kwaye bekulungele ukuya kwihlabathi njengabantu abadala, abazali kufuneka banike isixa esikhulu kakhulu kuneso esisifumana ebuntwaneni, ebuntwaneni nasekufikiseni. Yindalo yobuzali.

USaint Francis waseAssisi wayengengomzali, kodwa umthandazo wakhe uthetha ngqo nabazali.

Nkosi, ndenze isixhobo soxolo lwakho;
apho kukho intiyo, mandihlwayele uthando;
kwimeko yokonzakala, uxolo;
apho kukho intandabuzo, ukholo;
apho ukuphelelwa lithemba, ithemba;
apho bukhona ubumnyama, ukukhanya;
kwaye apho kukho usizi, uvuyo.
Owu Nkosi yam, ndinike ukuba mhlawumbi ndingafuni okungako
ukuthuthuzelwa kangangoko ukuthuthuzela,
kuqondwa njengokuqonda,
ukuthandwa nokuthandwa.
Kuba kusekunikezeni oko sikwamkelayo.
sikuxolelo ukuba sixolelwe,
kungokufa kwethu ukuba sizalelwe ubomi obungenasiphelo.

ULuciana, onentombi ekwishumi elivisayo esandul’ ukufunyaniswa ukuba ine<em>anorexia, unxulumanisa la mazwi: Sivumele ukuba ndingazami nzima kangaka ukuze ndiqondwe ukuze ndiqonde. “Ndiye ndafunda amandla okuzama ukuqonda nokunika ithemba intombi yam ngenxa yokungatyi kakuhle. Utshilo kumatyeli amaninzi ukuba andikholelwa ukuba uya kuphumelela, uphelelwa lithemba. Undibuza nje ukuba ndimxelele ukuba angakwazi ukuya kwelinye icala. Xa ndibonakala ngathi andikholelwa, akakholelwa,” utsho uLuciana. “Elona xesha lindivula amehlo njengomzali endikhe ndanalo. Kubunzima bentombi yam, ndiye ndafunda ukuba simele sivakalise ukholo lwethu ngokuvakalayo kubantwana bethu xa bekwelona xesha lobumnyama. “

Ngoxa uSt. Francis engazange alikhankanye igama elithi “ukuhlelwa” emthandazweni wakhe, ukuba abazali banqwenela ukubonisa ukuqonda okanye intuthuzelo ngokufuthi oko sikhetha ukungakuthethi kunokubaluleka ngaphezu kwayo nayiphi na enye into. UBrigida, umama wabantwana abane abakwishumi elivisayo nabakhulileyo uthi: “Ndivakalelwa kukuba ndiye ndaluphepha ungquzulwano olungeyomfuneko nokuqonda okuhambele phambili ngokunika abantwana bam ithuba lokuba babe ngabo bafuna ukuba ngabo ngelo xesha. “Abantwana bafuna indawo yokuphonononga ezi zinto baze bazame izimvo zabo. Ndikubona kubalulekile ukubuza imibuzo kunokubandakanyeka ekugxekeni kunye namagqabaza. Kubalulekile ukwenza oku ngethoni yokufuna ukwazi, hayi ukugweba."

UBrigid uthi nangona ebuza imibuzo ngokuzolileyo, intliziyo yakhe isenokubaleka kukoyika oko umntwana wakhe acinga ukukwenza: ukufuduka, ukufumana umvambo, ukuyishiya icawa. Kodwa ngeli lixa ezikhathazayo ngezi zinto, akayibonakalisi inkxalabo yakhe – kwaye oko kube nemiphumo emihle. “Ukuba andiyenzi ngam, kodwa ngabo, inokuba lixesha elihle lokonwabela uchulumanco lokwazi lo mntu uvelayo,” utshilo.

Kuba uJeannie, inxalenye yokuzisa uxolelo, ukholo, ithemba, ukukhanya, kunye novuyo ukuba uSt. Francis uthetha ngonyana wakhe, umfundi omtsha kwisikolo samabanga aphakamileyo, kubandakanya ngokuqaphela ukuthatha inyathelo ukusuka kwindlela uluntu olumcela ngayo ukuba agwebe unyana wakhe. Uzibona ethandaza yonke imihla ukuba uThixo amkhumbuze ukuba amjonge unyana wakhe ngengqondo eyinyani. “Abantwana bethu bangaphezulu kwamanqaku ovavanyo, amanqaku kunye namanqaku okugqibela omdlalo webhola yomnyazi,” utshilo. “Kulula kakhulu ukuba lixhoba lokulinganisa abantwana bethu ngezi mpawu. Abantwana bethu abaninzi ngakumbi. "

Umthandazo kaSt Francis, osetyenziswa kubazali, ufuna ukuba sibekho kubantwana bethu ngendlela enokuba nzima xa ii-imeyile kunye nempahla yokuhlamba impahla kunye nemoto idinga utshintsho lweoli. Kodwa ukuze sizise ithemba kumntwana ophelelwe lithemba ngenxa yokulwa nomhlobo, simele sibekho ngokwaneleyo ukuze loo mntwana abone oko kusenokuba kuphosakele. USt. Francis usimema ukuba sijonge phezulu kwiifowuni zethu, siyeke ukusebenza, kwaye sibone abantwana bethu ngokucacileyo okuvumela impendulo efanelekileyo.

UJenny, umama wabantwana abathathu, uthi sisigulo esibuhlungu somnye umama awayesazi esaguqula imbono yakhe. “Yonke imizabalazo, imingeni, kunye nokufa kukaMolly ekugqibeleni kwandenza ndacinga ngendlela endinethamsanqa ngayo ukuba ndibe nosuku nabantwana bam, kwaneentsuku ezinzima. Wabhala ngesisa uhambo lwakhe kwaye wanika usapho kunye nabahlobo ingqiqo enzulu kubunzima bakhe bemihla ngemihla. Ndinombulelo ongazenzisiyo ngaloo nto,” utsho uJenny. “Amazwi akhe andenza ndacinga ngakumbi ngokuchitha ixesha elincinane ndize ndilixabise ixesha endinalo nabantwana bam, yaye oko kundizisele umonde nokuqonda ngakumbi ekukhuliseni kwam. Ndiziva nditshintshile kwaye nditshintshe indlela endinxibelelana ngayo nabo. Elinye ibali lokulala, esinye isikhalo sokucela uncedo, enye into yokundibonisa. . . . Ngoku ndiyakwazi ukuphefumla ngokulula ngakumbi, ndiphila ngoku,

Uqhagamshelo lukaJenny kumthandazo kaSaint Francis lomelela ngakumbi ngokusweleka kukayise wakutsha nje, owayequka umthandazo kaSaint Francis onendlela yokukhulisa abantwana egxile ekuqondeni nasekuxhaseni unkosikazi nabantwana bakhe abathathu. Uthi: “Ikhadi likatata lomthandazo emngcwabeni wakhe laliquka nomthandazo weSt. Francis. “Emva komngcwabo, ndafaka ikhadi lomthandazo kwisipili sam sokunxiba njengesikhumbuzo semihla ngemihla sendlela yakhe yothando nokuba ngumzali nendlela endifuna ukuzibonakalisa ngayo ezo mpawu. Kwakhona ndabeka ikhadi lomthandazo kwigumbi ngalinye labantwana bam njengesikhumbuzo esichuliweyo semihla ngemihla nakubo ngothando lwam kubo”